At this time of the year, I start making promises I know I won’t keep for the coming year. All the things I failed to accomplish during the current year, I pile up into a nice little list and hope that this time, I’ll actually follow through on all my resolutions.
I’m not saying I wont do it…in fact, I’m looking forward to doing it. I cant help myself. There’s something about writing down my hopes for the next 12 coming months that gets me just a little bit excited. That’s partly because I know I have the power to manifest everything on that list. I can immediately start putting several things in place to get on track to achieving those goals.
Like most fellow resolution makers, however, follow-thru is where I fall flat. Either life gets in the way or I lose interest entirely, which I think says more about my lack of real desire than it does my inability to finish.
If you want something bad enough, you’ll do anything to get it. I hate the feeling of disappointment I feel at the end of the year when I look back at that list and can only cross off one or two things. So this year, I think I’m going to do something different.
Rather than focus on what I wish to accomplish the next year in 2013, I think I’ll reflect on the things I have accomplished for current year. I think it will be a far better motivator than the previous method. We’ll have to see. In light of this new strategy, here are 10 things I have accomplished in 2012.
1. Transitioned from an Entrepreneur to a business owner.
It took some time for me to understand that there’s a difference between working for yourself and having a business. Working for yourself can sometimes be worst than working for an employer.
I know a couple who started a Dental practice and can’t understand for the life of them why they’re not sipping Piña Coladas in Mexico for most of the year. They weren’t willing to take a lifestyle hit early on in order for bigger gains in the future. As a result, their clients own their time and they’ve been cutting their way to profit.
If I didn’t fail big from my first business venture, this basic concept would have eluded me to this day. It’s a game changer and the benefits are already showing.
2. Increased the amount of quality time I spend with my kids.
I’ve had the privalege of working from home. My kids don’t go to daycare so you’d think there’d be plenty of time for rolling around in the grass. Not so.
I spend half my day strategizing, another good portion actually putting in work and then I want to veg. As I write this, my 3 year old is pushing his little sister out of a toy car he can no longer fit in and I’m feeling a little guilty about not engaging with them.
Then I start to think maybe I’m depriving them of fun they could be having at a day care . Perhaps the play ground isn’t enough.
I’d definitely have more time if I shipped them off for a couple of hours everyday, but they have so much fun at home as well.
My biggest failure has been with letting the television do the baby sitting. No tv means the need for increased activity and engagement. Since I’m not comfortable with day care and I don’t want Mickey Mouse doing all of the teaching, I had to step up the QT. They’re happier lot for it and I don’t feel as guilty.
Ive been able to teach my son some phonics and now he can sound out and actually read (not memorize) basic words at only 3 years old. He’s also learning to add as well. He in turn teaches his little sister. Surely, I should earn a mommy badge for that!
3. Started my healthy lifestyle journey.
Most importantly, I learned to love working out. It sort of just clicked for me.
Having been skinny for over half my life, I started putting on weight faster than I was shedding. I’ve been a carboholic and didn’t even realize it.
I hate diets however, and refuse to do it. My obsession with bread, rice and sweets always got the best of me though. Working out without eating right is like throwing good money after bad. Foolish. The key was changing my lifestyle.
Tim Ferris’s 4 Hour body is sort of genius and I can’t ever eat the way I did before. Even when I fall off the wagon, I simply get back on. My journey to health is not a race…more like a marathon. I’ll get there on my time.
4. Learned to meditate.
I never got the point of meditation, but so many of my ‘virtual’ mentors indulged in the practice that I couldn’t ignore it.
It seemed almost impossible to clear my mind for more than 15 seconds. Try doing this with two sleep deprived, hungry, clingy kids. Even when its quiet, so much stuff goes on in there, I found it nearly impossible to shut off my mind.
Practice does make perfect. In two weeks, I was able to shut off crying, phones ringing, and random crazy thoughts…and I stopped falling asleep too. I started with 10 minutes and now working towards 20. Meditation makes me feel good.
5. Wrote a book.
A real book, with data and facts. It is called relationshipDNA , Why You Love the Way You Do and I slapped it on Kindle. So now I can call myself, an Author!
Riding on this accomplishment, I’ve started 3 of 5 novels I’ve wanted to write since…like-forever! It was one of the most difficult things I’ve ever imposed on myself, but I’m so glad I did it.
6. I stopped writing story lines.
Question mark right? This one is really about the realization that people thought less about me than I previously imagined. I learned that perceived slights are mostly my perception.
This was important because I constantly got my feelings hurt, which many times caused more issues and problems for me than necessary.
The point is, I no longer harbor resentments or stay angry with people. This has has done several things for me.
1. I’m no longer driven by what people think of me.
2. My self worth doesn’t take as many hits as it used to…
3. I stay in line with what matters to me.
One of the biggest paradigm shifts I’ve had in my life. Thanks Tony!
7. Made it through another year without having to work for the man.
Shutting down our only source of income before getting our new business off the ground was probably a mistake we wouldn’t make again, but flying without a net had its advantages. It has been sh*t my pants scary sometimes, but we’be gone through another 360 something days without lending an employer my time for pennies.
8. Got rid of the last few crabs in my bucket.
And then I got rid of the bucket altogether. I didn’t realize just how small my world actually was. Ignorance is a bitch, if you desire more out of life than what you were given. The minute you try to reach for something better, something more, you’re reminded at every waking moment that you don’t have the right to want for more.
‘Don’t go chasing waterfalls. Just stick to the rivers and the lakes that you’re used to.’
Well, that’s just not gonna work for me. Anyone who clashes with this crazy, big dreamer is directed to the exit. Come back and visit when you get some hootspa.
9. Made Family a Priority
Ever since my brother passed earlier this year, I realize just how fleeting life really is. I didn’t get to say good bye to him, but I think I was okay with that because I spoke to him two days before his life was snuffed out of him.
It wasn’t a great conversation, but he wasn’t in the greatest state of mind. I’m just glad I have some of his messages. They all go something like this.
‘Hey sis. Everything good? Tell mom to call me. Love you.’
I have those only because we communicated often. I listen to one every week. Lesson learned. As a result, I try to communicate with my mom at least every other day and I’m also trying to be a better older sister to the only brother I have left.
10. Figured out what I “really” want for my life.
I used to say I wanted to drive a certain type of car, and wear this brand of clothing, all the superficial crap we want to make our lives seem significant in some way.
Now I say things like, I’d like to travel, by my mom the house she’s always wanted and run a crazy marathon.
I don’t want things…I want a rich life. It’s taken about 30 years to get to this point, and I can honestly say the journey was well worth it.
Everything I do now has to have some kind of point and meaning to it or it won’t get done. This year has been a roller coaster ride of ups and downs and I’m so glad the new year, 2013 will be starting off in a kick ass way.
My theme for 2013: Carpe Diem.
What yours? And what have you accomplished for 2012?